Waitress (Broadway musical)

Post-show reflection.

It’s more than just a musical. It’s a story of domestic abuse turned into a woman’s new-found strength. I found myself in tears from the first few songs as we learned of the main character’s situation. She is stuck. And her husband is too dopey to notice that he’s ruining her life. When she discovers that her doctor actually cares about her, Jenna’s first reaction is to hate him. She says “I think you’re strange” because she’s never felt compassion from another human. Only selfish love from her horrible husband, Earl.

Oh Sara. Your melodies are timeless. I feel so connected to the story of these characters because the music has such a vibrant colour to it. I noticed that the cast really had to push their breath out with each note due to the rhythmical complexity of Sara’s score. The cast also had to really focus their performing on singing rather than acting and moving to execute the high-low pitch ratio. I listened to Sara’s other albums on the way home because I couldn’t get enough.

Christopher Fitzgerald is a MASTER of comedy. He knew exactly how to get the audience on his side. Watching him work was a real treat that I won’t forget. I’ve followed him since his run as Boq in Wicked and I was fan-girling so hard. The people behind me were probably so confused as to why this broadway-lover was jumping up and down in her seat. His timing and physical abilities were just the cherry on top of the pie that this character needed. Every single audience member was laughing, even when he cartwheeled off-stage. True performer.

Also, June Squibb! I mean, could there be anyone better to play Joe?! Better than the original cast member!

I will say that the performance I saw had four understudies and it was very noticeable. Dr. Pomatter was flat and tried too hard to sing like a musical theatre actor. He was more gifted in his comedic lines but that’s probably because the character is so lovable in the book. As well, the woman who played Dawn missed the mark in terms of capturing the anxiety-ridden waitress. Undoubtedly, she got lost next to Chris Fitz. Sorry girl! *backwards snap lean-back*

Stephanie Torns as Jenna made everything better. She definitely carried the show and didn’t fuddle with the intensity of multiple solos. I could tell her voice was a bit coarse from the weather of January but her version of “She Used to be Mine” had just the right emotional range. I especially enjoyed her stoic gaze as Earl prodded her and grabbed her during their scenes. Very well done. She also looked oddly similar to Jessie Mueller (who originated the role) so that helped!

All in all, I cried a lot and laughed a lot and appreciated the story more than anything else. If only I could have seen Gavin Creel and Sara Bareilles in the main roles, but their schedule doesn’t start until I leave New York. Still glad I saw it.

The Ferryman (play on Broadway)

Post-show reflection.

I am so absolutely in love with this piece of work. It tackles familial compassion like I’ve never seen before. This group of unlucky Irish people fight against so much and still have time to spare a drink, a bite or a dance with each other. I admire the characters’ energy levels even though most of them never seem to sleep. Caitlyn Carney, the widow, has her duties for the family and always gets them done. She fights the urge to follow her heart and in return, she is tragically at a loss at the end of the play.

I feel a connection to the 20-something men who drink while spitting insults at each other playfully. They remind me to enjoy the friends who end up taking care of you when you are too drunk to exist. Also, Fra Fee is my new crush. Damn.

The relationship of Quinn and Mary has such a sour taste to it that I find myself wanting them to stay a part in the future. Of course, they would never break up their incredible family of 7 kids, but how did they manage to fall in love? Their compatibility is very low even if it’s true that opposites attract. I don’t see them continuing as husband and wife if this play were to go on past the curtain call.

And, speaking of the curtain call. 2 encores and a standing O? Only musicals usually bring that much excitement to an audience. I am so grateful I got to stand there with the other theatre-lovers and applaud the cast’s effort. It gives me great joy to congratulate something that deserves it.

All in all, this show is true contender for a Tony. It has the heart and blood that dignifies what a new play should bring to Broadway. I’ll be shocked if it doesn’t win.

Examples of self-destruction

While on a bus trip, I decided to ask my Instagram story what are the worst ways that humans can self-destruct themselves? Here are the responses, feel free to add your own in the comments:

Not staying true to yourself. Stop doing stuff or saying stuff just to please society. I think when you’re not honest with yourself and you’re not listening to your inner voice, that’s when you self-destructed.

To continue to put limits on yourself that don’t exist.

Construct nuclear weapons.

Indulgence. Hate. Jealousy.

Thinking that your voice/opinion is unnecessary for people to hear. Mostly in conversational settings.

Giving in way too easy to outside voices. She did this, he said that… you amplify the words and actions of others to the point where it’s almost impossible to see any good. Staying connected to what really makes you happy will always help in keeping your head up, and your heart open.

Overthinking and doubting your capabilities!!!

Stress about too many things… if it won’t matter a year from now it’s not worth obsessing over.

If you can be a master of your own creation than you can be a master of your own destruction too. The mind is both your greatest strength and your greatest weakness. Too much thought and you become paralyzed in indecision while too little thought leads to the snowballing of poor decisions with grim consequences. In other words, humans haven’t yet realized that there is a limit to how much of the natural world they can control and it’ll be too late when they find out what that limit is. You need to let go and let nature take its course and simply co-exist.

Forgetting to self care, or deliberately not self caring, so like not showering, not having your daily cup of coffee/tea, throwing your coat on the floor instead of hanging it up. Really easy things that make you feel human that sometimes you don’t do.

On the Importance of a Greek Chorus

As a performance begins, the audience rests quietly while a group of people in front of them hold up a mirror. The performer strives to grab the audience by the heartstrings, and builds a strong connection between the stage and the seating area. Throughout history, the world of theatre has helped humans make elaborate changes to social and political issues, including certain decisions that pertain to morality and religion. This impact is the reason humans seek the cathartic experience of theatre, specifically the classic Greek plays that have lasted for so long. What is it about Aeschylus’ ​Agamemnon​ or Euripides’ ​Medea​ that still rings true to an audience of modern humans? The text and music are certainly crucial to the telling of a story; however, without physical movement there is not enough context for the audience to relate to. Especially if the performance is set in a different language, the audience can only hold onto the visual picture for guidance. This is where the chorus, primarily meaning “the dance” in Greek language, comes in handy (Hamilton 144). The group of performers who comment on the action of the play and usually move in unison is the essential element for a performance to be successful. Without the chorus and their body language, the audience loses touch with the humanity of a performance, especially during a play written many centuries ago.

In terms of the history of Greek movement, there was a time when chorus work was limited to singing and text-work. Although this was still a valid opportunity for objective narration and commentary, it was not effective enough to aid the audience in understanding the play (Wiles 110). It was not until 467 B.C. when a legendary dancer by the name of Telestes was performing in Aeschylus’s ​Seven against Thebes​ and decided to break off from the chorus group. Telestes was the first recorded pantomime actor in Greece to use gestures and fancy footwork as a way to interpret the text of the chorus (Lust 20). This sudden change led to expand the way the audience hears a phrase of words, and it shaped the harmony of choreography and text. As a word is being recited, the movement correlated with it defines the rhythm of pitch and volume so as to widen the understanding of the definition (David 93). The marriage of text and movement creates more depth to a play, causing the audience to feel more deeply. The famous author Homer states that the Greek mime’s art is “noble and divine”, while Seneca, the Roman philosopher, describes it as a mute language well “spoken” (Lust 23). While words and music have so much to give, the articulation of movement has the ability to take over in the most fruitful way. Another example of how movement explores the human condition is shown in the complicated play ​Medea​ by Euripides. During one scene, Medea announces that she will murder her children, and the chorus distances themselves from her into a tight circle to demonstrate the effects of exclusion (Wiles 107). Visually, the audience can label Medea as an outcast, who is making a self-assertive decision by herself. If the chorus orients themselves closer to her, the effect of her choice to kill her offspring would be illustrated in a tame manner. Working with the strengths of the chorus can heighten the stakes for the main character and bring more emotional complexity to the play.

Indeed, when a performer chooses a movement to display on a stage, the audience finds relatable qualities in the performer’s vulnerabilities. The everyday human walks, claps, shakes, and freezes without realizing how much movement is created. Many theatre-goers are uneducated in the study of movement, but use the experience of live performance to assess emotional situations. Bryan Doerries writes in his book, ​The Theater of War​, that “certain plays seemed as if they might have something important to say to people working in professions that brought them into close, daily contact with suffering and death, but who had no outlet for acknowledging the moral and emotional stress of their jobs” (Doerries 153). Considering this, it is clear why performance continues to be so impactful in the life of the working human. Going to a stressful job that requires many relentless tasks can take a toll on the emotional response of a human and can cause the creative soul to deteriorate. This terrible consequence must be met with means of outward expression, and by attending a live performance with other people looking to release their own stress, the working human can return to their most instinctual self. Furthermore, the audience members form a natural community with each other during a performance due to the simple fact that they all decided to sit down, and face the same direction for a period of time. Being a part of a group sends a feeling of belonging to each audience member, and this experience is unique to the magic of live theatre: “Sometimes during powerful moments, when actors are able to convey the truth of an experience, audience members begin breathing together, inhaling and exhaling at once. Whenever this happens, the quality of the silence in the theater deepens, and the audience listens with a level of attention that is rarely achieved in today’s fast-paced world” (Doerries 209). Here, Doerries describes the atmosphere through the involuntary movements of theatre-goers. Even as the audience sits still, there is a ceaseless physicality in their position, causing the audience to feel united. In some ways, the audience assembles into its own choral group, staying put for the duration of the performance (Wiles 110). If the main characters of a play function to solve the problem of the plot, then the chorus represents the through-line between performer and audience member. Just as the chorus comments on the action of the play (Hamilton 144), the audience watches in a state of intense pensivity and emphasizes for the main characters. Thus, the working human, who spends many hours moving around to accomplish tasks for the sake of their job, finds solace in the profound experience of being an audience member of live performance.

Not only is a Greek chorus important for the use of movement, but it can also help reach audience members sitting at the back rows of an enormous Greek theatre. The elaborate structure of ancient Greek theatres forces performers to project their voice outwards. When discussing movement, the human eye is better equipped to focus on a group of performers in unison, predominantly if an audience member is sitting far from the stage (Wiles 110). The scaling of movement in regards to a large theatre can only be executed when the members of the chorus are being used properly. Consequently, this created a division between the actor and the chorus when ancient Greek companies were touring:

“The surviving theatres of the Greek world have stages on which the ‘actors’ performed, whilst the chorus danced in the orchestra below… It was not feasible for a team of fifteen dancers to tour the world, and if the local community was able to provide choral dancers, those dancers would not have a chance to rehearse with the actors, so the physical separation of actors and chorus became an inevitability” (Wiles 104).

Moreover, when an actor stands alone on the stage, they can use their singular voice to express the character’s pain and suffering, aiding in the display of vulnerability. On the other hand, when a chorus erupts into using voice and movement as a group, the audience hears and sees more clearly into where the plot is going and why the main character is troubled. Trying to broaden the storytelling to a theatre of over 700 people is quite difficult with one performer. In the example of Aeschylus’ ​Agamemnon,​ the character Clytemnestra positions herself upstage for most of the play, making small movements on the spot. Although this blocking decision causes her to dominate as the magnificent element of the play (Hamilton 154), she pales in comparison to the choral work of the men spread out in front of the stage who, as a group, move with grace and speak with gusto. The eye falls towards the chorus who fill up the theatre “as the extension of a particular character with whom it expresses solidarity” (Wiles 110). For this reason, Clytemnestra would seem too small in front of such a large audience if it were not for the juxtaposition of the chorus members. An audience member that views the performance from a substantial distance must be able to experience the show in a similar way to another spectator, sitting in the front row. Therefore, the relationship between actor and chorus has a significant role in the effectiveness of a play that is staged in an ancient Greek theatre.

In conclusion, the members of the chorus have a remarkably important job to do in order for a play to successfully attain the attention of the audience. Within its movement and spatial patterning, the chorus is crucial in guiding the audience towards the most touching elements of a live performance. Dance gestures that speak to the text and the song of a play enhance the way an audience connects to the main characters and the problems that they work through. Simply put, if the chorus is not involved enough in a performance, the audience would feel left out to a certain extent. Ancient Greek theatres, and the ones that are still active to this day, challenge the performer to cast out their expressiveness to the theatre-goers sitting in the back row, and this can only be done well with the extraordinary role of the chorus.


Works Cited

David, A. P. ​The Dance of the Muses: Choral Theory and Ancient Greek Poetics. O​ xford University Press, 2006.

Doerries, Bryan. ​The Theater of War: What Ancient Greek Tragedies can Teach Us Today. Alfred

A. Knopf, 2015.

Hamilton, Edith. ​Three Greek Plays. ​Norton, 1965.

Lust, Annette. ​From the Greek Mimes to Marcel Marceau and Beyond: Mimes, Actors, Pierrots, and Clowns : A Chronicle of the Many Visages of Mime in the Theatre. ​Scarecrow Press, 2000.

Wiles, David. ​Greek Theatre Performance: An Introduction. C​ ambridge University Press, 2000.

Why The Try Guys are exactly the channel we need right now.

I heard about The Try Guys when I saw a BuzzFeed video featuring guys contouring their boobs. Naturally, I was convinced that it was some kind of joke, but I clicked and was excited to see adult males being open to trying new things. This is what I’ve been wanting from YouTube. I’ve been watching every video that these four guys make since then and I couldn’t be more satisfied. This is what we NEED to be watching and it mostly has to do with the level of representation on this channel. Take a read.

Firstly, this group of men is 3/4 white. This comes across as being not diverse when you look at the stats, but it is completely okay in the context of their brand. Ned Fulmer, Keith Habersberger, and Zach Kornfeld are three white men who frequently comment on how bland they are. They want to learn about certain topics that would usually go in the hands of coloured people and I think that is perfectly legitimate. If our society is dominated by white men who stereotypically live through their day, we aren’t making any progress. It is awesome to see white men trying to change the racial norms that currently stagger us. Examples of these videos would be when they try K-Pop, cosplay, BDSM and more. 

Looking at sexually orientation, again, it is three-quarters straight. When the men discuss topics like fashion or body image, it is clear that they look to Eugene Yang, the one racially-diverse and queer member of the group for guidance. Eugene helps to tie up all the loose strands when it comes to videos that need representation of all groups. He offers insight of what it actually feels like to be from a minority group so that it doesn’t just look like the other men are making fun of these topics. For example, on December 7 2014, BuzzFeedVideo uploaded “The Try Guys Try Drag For The First Time”. We see the process that these men go through of getting tucked, putting on full face make-up and working the runway—all things that many gay men are doing for a living. With help from professional drag queens, The Try Guys learn about this intense kind of job with complete openness. Videos like these and many others help to break the stigma of who can appreciate drag and why it doesn’t have to be labeled as “a gay thing”.

Now, it is true that they are all men. This wouldn’t seem acceptable in the context of today’s MeToo movement, but like I mentioned before, it is part of the brand they are trying to put out. They want other men like them to experience what women go through including labour, fashion expectations, and even boob weights. In my opinion as a woman, they do a really great job of trying to make it an authentic experience. Kudos to them! 

All the other videos that they produced and continue to create take from all aspects of society and politics. Keith, Zach, Ned and Eugene keep the internet from being one-sided and narrow-minded by simply trying new things. It really doesn’t require a lot of effort to go into a new experience with the mind-set that it could be the best experience of their lives. We are all allowed to be whomever we want, and try whatever we want. This is why I am grateful this channel exists on YouTube and I hope more people gravitate to their videos. 

Three domains

If my mind isn’t working properly, my body tends to decline into not functioning the way it usually does. I’m off my centre and my muscles get tired quicker.

If my mind isn’t working properly, my heart tends to decline into negative self-criticism so that my energy is low. I feel sad and hopeless even though nothing is actually wrong. The people around me seem like enemies even though they are angels.

If my mind isn’t working properly then, my mind is not a part of me.

If my heart isn’t working properly, my body starts to deteriorate into doing things out of spite. I am forced to walk towards something rather than wanting to run towards it with open arms. I feel anger for the fact that I have to get out of bed. My breath patterns are quick and abrupt.

If my heart isn’t working properly, my mind finds ways to hate myself. It works in an unproductive way to negatively critique every desire I have. It brings out my anxiety and then I forget what I actually want in life. The bad chemicals are flowing everywhere in my brain.

If my heart isn’t working properly then, my heart is not my own.

If my body isn’t working properly, my mind overheats with having to work overtime. Too many thought processes come and go inside my mind in attempts to reach my nerve system. I have to constantly be alert or else I could walk into a speeding car. It’s happened before.

If my body isn’t working properly, my heart is heavy with depression. It’s not sadness. Instead robotism is the mask I wear. My body has always been my life raft if ever I needed saving from the scariness of life. If I can’t use my body, I feel nothing at all.

If my body isn’t working properly then, my body does not belong to me.

For Pepper, my cat.

Pepper, Pepperoni, Peps, THE FAT CAT.

We love you. Your fur was like a bionic black sheep that I could pet all day because it would never move. Yeah you were fat. But that didn’t mean that you weren’t beautiful.

I NEVER FORGAVE YOU FOR NAILING ME WITH YOUR CLAWS. And why were you so afraid all the time? Like my friends didn’t know what the hell to do with you.

But seriously, you were a staple in my life. I always knew you were there if I needed you. I’m sorry I barely did the same. I never wanted to do the dirty work with your litter box and food. It’s pathetic to me now, because if I want to handle responsibility in my life I need to be able to take hygienic and nutritional initiative. Your health could have been better if I had been more caring. I am sorry. I learned a lot from having you in my life.

Your silent presence kept our house from blowing up. I knew that when I saw you peering at us during a family argument, I should stop yelling and chill out. In some cases, you were like a therapist for me. Your eyes had millions of years deep inside them, and when we had our staring contests, you always lost because you knew you were WAY above it all. A true queen.

I remember getting you from the animal place (was it a shelter or pound or store…? Can’t quite remember) and your terrified sprints once we showed you your new home for the next 16 years. What a scary moment for you. It’s funny to think that you became royalty in our house… owning your spot above the couch in the living room, meowing even at 4am for food, scratching the couches, and hissing away trespassing cats through the patio door window… We all could sense that your spot in our house was indefinite. You needed to be there or else we were doomed.

Thank you for using your sneaky skills for good and for travelling with us. I know the cottage wasn’t your favourite place, especially once it got rebuilt, but your mouse-trapping abilities were killer. Let’s hope you can run and play in heaven just the same.

Sweet dreams my kitty cat. Your legacy lives on.