A Piece of Salt for the Soul

Selina Thompson’s performance in salt. was breathtaking to say the least. She delivered each line of text with such grace that it was easy to forget how incredibly sad her story was. The piece touched upon harsh themes, but Thompson allowed for moments of comedic light to keep the audience from pulling back. She described her unforgettable journey that took her across the world in the bottom of a cargo ship, handling many instances with sexist and racist men. A major portion of the performance included the use of a sledgehammer to smash a huge chunk of pink salt. She kept breaking it down that eventually, the salt turned into miniscule pieces of dust as she listed all of the governmental issues in our society. Each time she swung the sledgehammer, the intensity increased making this a helpful concept to accurately display Thompson’s anger. As well, it is clear that she has a background in spoken word because her rhythmic projection of voice was still audible even when she smashed the hammer on the ground. It was brilliantly executed.

The best moment in my opinion was when Thompson paused half-way through an emotional part of her story to lie down on her side. At first, this choice seemed too casual for such a profound moment, but I found myself to be blown away by this change in orientation. Putting herself at the same level as the stage created a strong relation with her and the audience, and The Theatre Centre’s Franco Boni Theatre is constructed to provide a deep closeness for the audience and the performer. She then continued speaking about the horrible men that constantly bothered her during her trip, remaining on her side. These men gave her enough stress to cause her to miss her menstruation cycle throughout the trip, and Thompson used her charm to reveal this private piece of information. Her bravery to be candid with the audience heightened the performance, and I will never forget how powerful it was to watch. She brought a unique sensation to the piece, inspiring me to choose the adventurous life over the boring and mundane version. No matter how isolating it can be to travel away from home, Thompson reminded me that the best stories come out of the most anxiety-ridden experiences. Also, the piece of salt that each audience member received was a memorable way to finish off Selina Thompson’s esoteric story.

Candles on the card game table

When I was growing up, my family and I were lucky enough to have a cabin located alongside a cute river. We travelled there to find serenity probably about 3 times a year and every time we were there, I would find solace on the makeshift swing set my dad constructed between two trees. It was placed adjacent to the only pathway we took to get around the property. So essentially, I was always in the way. I swung back and forth watching my family dodge me as they needed to get somewhere, listening to my digital mp3 player that was stocked with every Disney Channel soundtrack. Camp Rock and The Lizzie McGuire Movie pushed me to swing higher and faster so that I could fly off the Earth. I remember this experience to be so exciting as a kid. Then, my mom would call me in to the cabin to have dinner. We didn’t have use of electrical power, so candles lit the way for us to eat and play card games before bedtime.

Tonight, I sat in my room during a power outage at my apartment and reminisced about what it felt like to enjoy an evening by candlelight. It seems I haven’t been away from electrical light enough because I felt completely relaxed. There’s something so natural about a soft light that only gives you a small diameter of vision. I read my book, listened to old music, and almost fell asleep at 7pm. 

Of course, as soon as my power came back on, I instantly opened up my laptop and connected to the internet. I can only dream.

A look back at January 2019…

I know I am capable of more than I think I am.

This mantra came to me during an improv class I took in New York at the beginning of this month. It stayed with me as I came back to Toronto and started my 2nd semester of third year. Saying this to myself, especially in times of desperation and sadness, helps me to crawl out of the dark place that I tend to go to often. The difference between knowing something and thinking something is so tricky, but if there’s one thing I know to be 100% sure it’s that I have more abilities than my brain can think up. That rumour that says we only use 10% of our brain scares me to bits. So, why not try to do more? To be more? To think more?

New York City, thank you.

My trip to NYC set up my 2019 in such an exciting way. The 7 days I spent there changed my negatives to positives and the city taught me to dream bigger. I woke up each morning ready to surpass my expectations of myself. By the end of the day, I was so tired that I fell right to sleep. This doesn’t happen in Toronto. Yes, it’s a big city too, but in Toronto, I can’t find the constant energy that I feel when I’m in New York. Could be the fact that some of most hard-working people live there and I would feel completely defeated if I hadn’t risen up to their level. Could also just be that I want to live there some day. I picture my life as a 25-40 year old in this city, working hard and playing harder. If only I could get my visa, everything would fall into place. I danced a lot while I was there. Not just in the classes I was taking at the Mark Morris Dance Centre but in the apartment I was staying at, and in the way I walked to the subway each day. I had a glide to my step that I’ve never felt before. I truly feel connected to the way New York functions. I love the art of the buildings; I love the lights that flash all night long; I love the sounds of tourists not knowing how great this city is. It brings me home every time I go there. I don’t feel like I’m just on a trip to another place. I feel like I’ve arrived to a joyful location that I’ve been away from for too long.

My new-found love for class.

With the classes I took in NY and the classes I have each day for school at Ryerson, I have found a new love for what it means to really use a class for its full benefits. My body and mind are shaky, but my heart is happy from the exertion of cardio and physicality. I’ve been striving to stay mindful during the ENTIRE class (which is so difficult somedays) and make sure to warm-up properly. I think what was holding me back from this for so long was that I was scared to mess up in front of people. Even my peers. I was anxious to fail for some reason. I want to be focused on my personal growth and on working smart and swiftly. This will help me achieve the body structure and artistic choices that I desire.

Helping children achieve!

Another happiness in my life has been and always will be teaching children. This month has brought new classes and rehearsals where I got to watch children enjoy the magic of dance. Teaching at Elite Danceworx lets me move away from my selfish tendencies and give my time to kids who just wanna dance! I can’t wait for more.

Bullet journaling, but not really.

I started watching bullet journalling videos on YouTube before bed to help me relax. The minimalist approach to the video (one shot with a book from bird’s eye view) has brought me into a state of calm and it has weirdly helped me stay productive. I’m not actually doing the bullet journalling, but watching other people organize their lives in creative and simple ways has been so inspiring. Maybe one day I’ll try to finish a journal, but I decided it would be too much to handle for the schedule I have currently.

No more clouds, but lightning remains.

My depression has been non-existent this month. The rainclouds have lifted from over my head, even though Toronto weather has been snowy to the max. Although I don’t feel down as much, my anxiety has been on full blast this month. I think that’s normal for a student of my level, and so I hope that next month I can find a balance of stress. Lightning strikes so quickly and powerfully and it causes my brain to run a million miles a minute. I’ll have a deadline to complete and my mind and body can’t seem to complete it without taking care of my heart. Luckily, February is my birth month and so I hope some extra love from my family and friends will guide me to find the balance I so greatly desire. My goal for February is accept all forms of love so that I can also give love in return. After all, Valentine’s Day is during this time of year!